Building Emotional Intelligence: Self-Regulation Strategies for Kids

While they might be little on the outside, preschoolers experience big feelings like we all do—and when frustration hits, they too need strategies to help self-regulate and continue on with their day productively. When kids learn how to manage their emotions in a healthy manner, they can better control their reactions and behavior, a key component for building a positive executive function foundation.

At Ducklings Early Learning Center, we work one-on-one with each child to help them manage big feelings in a way that fits their unique needs and personalities, since what works for one child might not benefit their classmate. We recognize the importance of self-regulation skills and offer a variety of ways for children to learn how to recognize and intentionally manage their emotions.

Why Self-Regulation Skills Matter in Early Childhood

Temper tantrums and other uncontrolled emotional responses are very stressful for all involved—the child, plus the parents and teachers who might feel helpless to support them through their frustration. 

When we learn to acknowledge what we’re struggling with, we can take positive steps to cope through the moment and recover appropriately. This approach drives valuable problem-solving skills, impulse control, and the ability to engage in rewarding social interactions and relationships.

Signs of Self-Regulation Skills in Young Children

Just as there are a range of learning strategies designed to support every child, there are various self-regulation skills that kids can have at their disposal when frustration strikes. Success in the kindergarten classroom and beyond requires the ability to contribute to the classroom environment by adhering to daily routines, taking turns, and having the confidence to identify and manage challenging emotions. These key skills are important early learning milestones that drive school readiness and long-term academic proficiency. 

5 Self-Regulation Strategies for Kids

At Ducklings, our teachers are trained to implement fun and interactive opportunities for preschoolers to learn to address and calm their strong emotions.

1. Deep Breathing Techniques

Breathing exercises are ideal for preschoolers to use to self-soothe when they are faced with a frustrating situation because they don’t require any supplies and can be done anywhere. Here are a few different techniques to try out together:

• Belly breathing
• Box breathing
• Animal breathing

2. Calm Down Corners

Whether a child’s response to a challenging emotion is to be disruptive or to draw inward to themselves, a designated place to go to acknowledge the situation, take a break, and recenter while staying in the classroom (or home) setting can be very effective. Keep it simple by providing a selection of soft pillows or blankets, books, art supplies, or sensory toys.  A calm down corner enables a child to self-regulate independently and safely.

3. Mindfulness Activities

A great resource for helping preschoolers stay focused and settled in their emotions is to engage in mindfulness activities. One option that can take place in any setting or with objects for variety is the five senses game, which places children firmly and securely in the current moment. 

For a more tangible approach, a glitter jar offers an interactive opportunity for preschoolers to create their own calming tool with the colors and sparkle of their choice. To help children express their current emotions, there are also numerous printable feelings charts available online to have handy at home or in the classroom.

4. Sensory Breaks

We all know the feeling of needing to move around after a period of sitting at a desk; sometimes kids can’t communicate this need, which leads to frustration. It’s important to schedule in movement breaks with easy walks around the classroom or backyard, stretching in place, or even accessible yoga for kids. Having sensory toys available also helps build body awareness and regulate the nervous system.

5. Turn-Taking Games

Taking turns is a foundational, life-long skill that can be taught and practiced with preschoolers in endless ways. From sharing snacks, working on a puzzle together, or playing a sport, any activity can turn into an example of how, even though impulse control and patience can sometimes be hard, it’s more fun when everyone gets to participate fairly. Taking turns also naturally encourages proactive problem-solving and cognitive flexibility.

3 Ways Parents Can Teach Self-Regulation at Home

Read on to learn some simple ways to help your child practice constructive self-regulation at home.

1. Model Calm Behavior

So much of a child’s early learning centers on imitation of the adults around them—and emotional regulation is no exception. Parents and caregivers should be aware of their own responses to stressful situations and practice positive role modeling by implementing some of the strategies that kids can use as well, such as belly breathing and sensory breaks.

2. Create Predictable Routines

Particularly in the early years, established routines help children feel stable and secure in what’s happening next and how they’re expected to behave. Implementing structured routines in the morning, at bedtime, and when making a transition can help diffuse overwhelming emotions. Be sure to lead with gradual change when making any shifts in regular routines.

3. Teach Emotional Vocabulary

When challenged with an emotion, it can be difficult for preschoolers to put into words how they’re feeling—which can in turn make it difficult to help them manage those emotions. Practice at home naming, identifying, and generally talking about a variety of feelings, both positive and negative. This makes it easier to communicate when a child is struggling with big emotions.

What to Do if Your Child Struggles with Emotional Regulation

Have you noticed that your child struggles more frequently with self-regulation, which they might display through temper tantrums, emotional outbursts, or uncontrolled impulses? Lead with patience and the understanding that they are trying to manage and communicate strong feelings. Try out some of the strategies referenced above to see if they might support healthy calming practices, and encourage your child to name and talk through what’s bothering them. 

When looking for a childcare program, be sure to include in your list of requirements teachers who promote emotion management and offer a variety of strategies for self-regulation. You can also reach out to our team if your child seems to be struggling more often.

How Ducklings Helps Kids Build Lifelong Emotional Skills

Ducklings Early Learning Center serves as more than just a preschool where your child spends the day. We partner with parents during the critical early childhood development stages, with a commitment to holistic social-emotional learning in a nurturing environment that supports the needs of every child.

Schedule a tour today to learn more about how the Ducklings Difference can get your child started on the path to successful learning in kindergarten and throughout their school years.